


Counting Steps

by Skylily



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bellarke, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-30
Updated: 2015-05-09
Packaged: 2018-03-04 08:05:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 15,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3023480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skylily/pseuds/Skylily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A few months after Finn's death and things are in shambles. Clarke's distant and always working. She's ignoring Bellamy, Raven hates her and the only person she really associates with these days is Octavia, but shes always with Lincoln. Only now have Monty and Jasper finally escaped Mount Weather, but with a cost. Everyone is together finally, the Ark included and with the peace treaty, the Grounders are no longer a major threat. But Earth is still not safe. Now a new enemy threatens them...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> First time writing fanfiction..I hope you enjoy :)
> 
> PS. I might include Murphy later on but haven't really made him a thing in this story yet, so yeah.
> 
> And also, while the title made sense when writing the first chapter, now that I've really started getting into the story, it doesn't really fit and I don't know, I might change it. We'll see. I'll try to incorporate it a bit more. Just wanted to put that out there. :)

Clarke had known with a dreadful certainty, that no matter what she or anybody else did, that someone was going to die. But under no circumstance had she allowed herself to believe it’d be Finn who would cease to exist. Let alone at her hands.

He ceased to exist now thanks to Clarke’s hands. The memory sent a shiver down her spine.

She wrapped her arms around her tighter, blaming the cold late-December air for her shudders. But even she knew better.

She was walking the perimeter of Camp Jaha, dead leaves crunching beneath her boots. She had taken this up after a month of sleepless nights and it was now routine for her, even months later after the incident. It had a calming effect, she found. 

Clarke kept her eyes trained on the ground, counting the steps she was taking to keep her mind from trailing to unacceptable thoughts. Sometimes she allowed herself to look outside the perimeter, out at the forest. But this never ended well; she either saw the post where he’d stood, or she’d remember the times where they had laid eyes on their first animal… Memories overwhelmed Clarke sharply: the bioluminescent forest, the deer, and the water-creature who had almost taken Octavia’s life. 

Clarke began counting her footsteps again. 50..51..52..53..54..55.

A gravelly voice interrupted her counting. “Clarke.”

She stopped walking, but didn’t lift her gaze to meet his eyes. Even Bellamy, the one who had never looked at her like fragile china, had begun to look at her with a distinct sadness in his dark eyes. She hated him for it. 

“You’re needed in the medical tent.” 

Her stomach clenched. “Who is it?” 

She studied the leaves that were scattered at her feet. A small, grey bug crawled over them. She would rather watch the bug for hours than meet his eyes. She could just imagine him now; his big, brown doe eyes looking at her like she’s some broken thing, his black curls draping his face in a way that always irritated her since it obstructed his view of things. 

“Look at me, Clarke.” 

She ignored his request and began to walk again. 56..57..58..59..60.

“Clarke.” He pleaded. 

Clarke continued. He did not follow. It’d be quicker to turn around and pass Bellamy to get to the medical tent, but she knew him well enough to know that he’d never let that slide. She would walk around instead. 

~ ~ ~

When she was reaching the tent, a voice yelled out in pain. A voice she hadn’t heard in a very long time. 

Monty.

Her throat restricted and she ran towards the tent; she ran towards his voice. 

She flung open the flap and took in the scene within seconds. Her eyes immediately found Monty, who lay on one of the makeshift medical beds, one of several scattered around the tent’s space. Tables were strewn around, too, piled with medical tools on top. Miscellaneous things were thrown about everywhere, such as discarded clothes, as well. The place was real mess and Clarke made a mental note to clean up when she had the time. 

Surrounding Monty stood several others: Jasper— oh, how she had missed him, too— Raven, another she hadn’t talked to in a very long time but for obvious other reasons, and Octavia, the only person she ever really talked to anymore, with Lincoln hovering closely behind her. 

She wanted to run and hug all of them, but the doctor within her rushed to the problem first. She made her way to the bed.  
“Monty! Oh, Monty…” She caressed his forehand, beads of sweat running down his face. She grabbed a cloth from a table and began to wash his face. While he’d been awake only a short time before, he had passed out. She turned on the others. “What happened?” 

Jasper looked at the floor, his whole body trembling. Octavia hurried to his side and wrapped him in a hug whispering into his ear and running her hands through his hair. Jasper seemed to only shake harder.

It was Raven who finally spoke up, but she did not look at Clarke. Instead, her eyes rested on Monty. “I don’t know much, Jasper had just started explaining before…before he basically broke down.” She sounded very far away. 

“He said…he said that they escaped, all of them. They had made it half way to the drop ship before they were basically ambushed. The mountain men swarmed them and just started shooting. Jasper said Finn,” Her voice choked on his name. Clarke focused on cleaning Monty’s face with a determination not meant for such simple tasks. 

Raven cleared her throat and straightened her posture. “Jasper said Finn had showed him an abandoned car, and in the chaos, Jasper grabbed Monty and shoved him toward the car. They jumped in and waited it out. Guards found them stumbling around in the forest near here and now they’re here.”

Clarke kept her voice soft trying to hide her irritation. “That doesn’t exactly tell me anything about what’s wrong with Monty, though.”

“Well you’re the doctor.” Raven snapped. “Find out yourself. That’s all I know.” She sent a look toward Octavia and glanced over at Monty before making an angry exit. Clarke felt a wave of sadness wash over her. They had never been close, not with the Finn drama, but now there was definitely no way they’d ever be friends. Any friendship that could’ve been was no longer a possibility. She’d taken Finn away from her not only once, but twice. This time permanently. There was no going back from that, ever.

Clarke decided to take Raven’s advice and look for the problem herself. She found it in no time and wondered why she had even asked in the first place. 

“Monty,” She whispered into his ear. “I’m going to need to take your shirt off, okay?” 

Knowing she’d never get a response from him, she took a knife from the side table and carefully cut the blood-soaked shirt from the unconscious boy’s body. She’d make sure he got a new one when he woke up. Belatedly, Clarke remembered just how cold it was and asked Lincoln to retrieve a few blankets for Monty. He nodded and left, the flap swaying after his exit. 

There was a loud gasp and then she felt Jasper at her side. Clarke grabbed Monty’s shoulder and carefully tilted his body to get a better view of his back, where she happily found an exit wound. Monty wouldn’t need surgery to remove the bullet and would probably recover just fine. Her heart swelled with happiness.

She stepped away and allowed Jasper to stand next to Monty. She knew they’d been through a lot and Clarke sighed at the sight in front of her; she hadn’t seen them in so long. She rested her hand on Jasper’s back and he tensed. 

She watched as he patted Monty’s hand before he turned towards her, his brown eyes drinking her in. His black hair was as curly as ever and could use a good wash, but then again, they all could. There was a long gash across his cheek and Clarke gasped. “Jasper, your cheek is bleeding.” She went to turn to grab the cloth she’d been previously using but was taken off guard when arms wrapped around her tightly. Jasper was trembling again.

Clarke wrapped her arms around his small frame. “Shhh,” She whispered resting her head on his shoulder. “Monty’s okay, you’re okay. Everyone’s okay.” Her voice cracked on everyone but she ignored it and tried to console Jasper. Slowly, he pulled away.

“Clarke, that’s not what’s wrong. I failed you.” He sniffled, eyes red and puffy. “I was…I was given the opportunity to come after you when you escaped but, I was too afraid. I stayed even though you would have gone after me. Monty wanted to go after you but I said no and…I just, I’m so sorry.”

Clarke didn’t know how to respond but just rested her hand on Jasper’s cheek. “It’s okay. I’m glad you didn’t come after me; I would never want you guys out there where you could get hurt, not when you were in a place you were supposedly safe and happy. I knew they wouldn’t hurt you, at least not before I had time to come rescue you. They wanted the Grounders.”

Jasper took her words in like a child being offered candy—greedily. “Do not think you were cowardly not going after me. You were smart, Jasper.” She finished.

“They wanted our blood, Clarke.” Jasper whispered. “It helped them.” 

Clarke sucked in her breath. She placed her hand on his arm now. “Shhh, you don’t have to talk about it right now, okay?” Jasper just nodded before giving Clarke another hug. “Let me fix up your cheek.”

She turned for a clean cloth and wet it lightly. She sat Jasper down and washed his face of all the grim, dirt and blood. The gash didn’t look as bad now and it was no longer bleeding. Clarke gave Jasper a small smile and patted his knee. He squeezed her hand.

Clarke turned away from him to finish fixing Monty up. Lincoln had returned with the blankets and draped them on Monty helpfully. He grabbed Octavia’s hand and waved a goodbye. “They’re serving lunch now, if you’re hungry.”

“I’ll see you later, Clarke.” Octavia said, waving. “Make sure you eat something.” Clarke nodded, giving the girl a small smile.

Later, Clarke’s gaze followed Jasper as he hopped off the bed, patted Monty’s hand again and walked out of the tent with the rest of her friends. She was alone once again.

That is, until Bellamy walked into the tent. She glanced up, completely taken off guard. “We need to talk, Princess.”


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gonna be honest, I have no idea where I'm going with this. I have a plot..just don't know how to fill the gaps. Kinda winging it here.
> 
> Enjoy. :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't have a whole lot of medical knowledge, even after I spent an hour and half researching, so I did what I could with Monty's situation..

Bellamy always chose the worst of times to talk, particularly when Clarke didn’t feel up to talking. She swore under her breath. “If you can’t tell, I don’t have time to talk right now.” 

He glanced around the tent noting the mess. “I can help you, if you’d like.”

Bellamy watched her closely, moving around the tent, and he caught the slight twitch of her lips. Had she smiled?

“Do what you’d like, Bellamy, you always have.” Clarke still hadn’t met his eyes.

He smiled faintly; at least she was talking to him. “Just tell me what to do, Princess.” 

Clarke flinched at the nickname but didn’t say anything about it. Bellamy practically deflated. “Help me move the beds.” 

He walked over to her and pushed the beds to the spot she pointed. That’s how they worked for the next hour; Clarke pointing, Bellamy doing. They worked in silence, rarely any conversation. It was driving Bellamy insane. The place looked good and organized, though.

“Alright, well. Thanks for the help.” Clarke said, dismissing him with a wave of her hand towards the tent’s exit. 

“Clarke, we should talk.” Bellamy leaned against a medical bed.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Clarke grabbed a bucket from the table beside Monty and walked towards the exit. She pushed the flap to the side and was gone. 

Bellamy was getting frustrated and exhaled loudly before straightening up and following her. On his way out, he bumped into a body and water was splashed everywhere. 

“Bellamy!” Clarke shrieked. “God damn it.” Clarke was drenched head to toe in water and it was freezing outside. She was already starting to shiver.

“Clarke, I’m sorry! I thought you’d left and—”

“Get out of my way, Bellamy.” Clarke shoved her way past him and back into the tent. Bellamy, of course, followed. She placed the bucket, now only half full, back next to Monty before turning on him. 

“I don’t have time to just sit down and chat like old buddies right now, especially since I have to go find a change of clothes.” She sighed.

Bellamy looked around and found a stray blanket next to Monty’s bed. He saw the boy already had a couple piled on him and figured he didn’t need it, so he grabbed it and started towards Clarke. “Come here, you’re going to get sick.” 

She didn’t remark back, but tensed when Bellamy put the blanket around her shoulders. He kicked himself for not just handing her the blanket. Now he was much too close to her and all he wanted to do was hug her until she was better. He didn’t, though. Clarke hated him enough.

“Thanks.” She whispered, stepping away awkwardly. Bellamy cleared his throat. 

“Look, Clarke,” He stared at his boots. “All I wanted to say was that our people need their leader back.”

She glanced up at him, confusion covering her face. “They have their leader; they have you, Bellamy.” 

Bellamy chucked softly. “We both know I lost the title long ago.” 

She stared at him before giving him a small smile. “We agreed that we were co-leaders.” 

“Fair enough…but that just proves my point. I need you.” 

Clarke’s eyes flickered to the ground, remembering the time she had said the same words to him. “Okay.”

Bellamy couldn’t hide his confusion. “Okay?” 

Clarke seemed to transform in front of his eyes. While she had been open before, she was no longer so; she was closed off yet again. She seemed to have turned to stone.

“I said okay. Now I’ve got to go,” She grasped Monty’s blankets and pushed them up under his chin to keep him warm. “I need to find a spare change of non-wet clothes.” 

Clarke pushed past him and right out the tent exit, blanket trailing behind her. Bellamy was left alone, with Monty, wondering what on Earth had made her change attitudes so quickly. Hadn’t he made progress with her? All of the last hour and a half seemed to have been flung right out the window.

“Well, she seems to be handling things well?” Said a croaky voice from behind Bellamy.

Bellamy turned to see Monty’s eyes open, staring at him. He went to his side, lifting some of the blankets away from his face so he’d be more comfortable.

“Yeah, she’s doing great. But how are you feeling?” He asked. He wasn’t like Clarke, he didn’t know how to comfort people or ease their pain—  
His thoughts flashed to Atom and how Clarke had mercy killed him— but he’d grown fond of Monty and Jasper and respected them after all they’d been through and he could at least try.

“Sore, but I lived, so.” He gave a small smile. “But really, how is she?”

Bellamy looked away from him. “I don’t know... I’m sure someone’s updated you on the past few months?” 

Monty nodded sadly. 

“Yeah, well, at first she played it off. She worked like normal, talked to everyone like normal…but then she just changed. Worked more, slept less— talked less. She’s basically isolating herself from everyone who was once close to her, besides Octavia.” He sighed, rubbing at the back of his neck. “We’re all worried about her.” 

Monty offered a kind smile. “She’ll be okay. She’s your ‘brave, Princess’ after all, right?”

Bellamy didn’t reply. He sure hoped so.

He looked over at Monty. “Get some sleep, okay? You need it. We need you on your feet as soon as possible, Soldier.” He said, before adding, “We’ve missed you. I’m glad you’re back.”

Monty smiled. “I’m glad I’m back, too. Can you tell Jasper I’m awake if you see him?” 

“Sure thing.” He patted Monty’s fortress of blankets awkwardly before turning to leave. He lifted the flap of the tent and was back out in the cold air.


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3! I didnt think I'd get this far, not gonna lie.
> 
> Enjoy!

Clarke was beyond frustrated with herself. The biggest problem was the fact that she didn’t even know why. Her stomach was knotted and she could feel her neck and cheeks burning. Bellamy Blake knew just how to get under her skin.

She hated him for it.

She seemed to hate him a lot lately; another thing she didn’t exactly understand. Yes, he looked at her with sadness, but that wasn’t quite it, was it? 

Clarke’s eyebrows knitted together and she pushed the thoughts away. She had to focus on getting these freezing wet clothes off her body before she caught Pneumonia or something. She’d discarded the blanket earlier, telling herself that it was doing more harm than good. She didn’t discard it simply because Bellamy had draped in on her shoulders. At least, that’s what she told herself. She pushed that thought away, too.

She was in the Ark, or at least, what was left of it after its trip down to Earth. It wasn’t nearly as crowded as she’d expected it to be with the cold weather and all. Instead, it was quiet and almost empty except for a few guards strolling around, rifles ready at a moment’s notice at their side. Clarke was rounding the corner when she smacked right into the second-to-last person she wanted to see at that moment. Her mother. 

Abby grabbed at her shoulders and stepped away from her slightly to get a good look at her daughter standing before her. She analyzed her from head to toe, taking in every single detail.

“Clarke, you’re soaking wet!” She clasped her cheek in her hand. “And you’re all flustered…are you okay?” 

Clarke had to suppress the need to roll her eyes at her mother, whom, to her discontent, still treated her like the 17-year-old juvenile in space. Clarke knew she was trying, though. 

“Yes, I’m fine. Bellamy ran into me while I had a bucket of water in my hands and well,” She gestured down herself. “I need to go find some clothes. Do you know where I can find some?” 

“Yes, of course. I’ll walk with you.” Abby linked arms with her daughter and began to take her in an entirely different direction than Clarke had been heading. It was silent between the two, but a nice silent. A silent that Clarke appreciated; that is, until Abby started talking again. 

“Look, I wanted to talk to you about—” Abby started but Clarke raised her hand. 

“Mom, I’m sorry I’m just not in the mood for a heart-to-heart conversation right now. Please understand that.” Clarke sighed, feeling exhaustion nipping at her body. She really just wanted to change into some warm clothes and go to bed despite the early hour. 

“Alright…” Abby said, awkward tension rising between the two. “I just wanted to inform you on some recent developments with Mount Weather.”

Clarke froze and turned to her mother, gripping at her wrist. Her eyes were wide. “What have you heard?

Abby straightened her posture. “Well…not much. But there’s been movement nearby, clearly not the Grounders with the new found treaty and all but… We think it might be Weather; especially now that Monty and Jasper have escaped.” 

Clarke was silent, processing everything. Were the people of Mount Weather going to attack them now that their people had escaped? Why would they…?

Clarke sucked in her breath. “Mom, they want our blood.” 

Abby’s face scrunched up. “They what?” 

“When I was there, they’d been capturing Grounders and using them…using them for their blood.” A shiver ran through her body and memories fought their way into her brain. Anya. “The blood healed them.”

“Healed them how, exactly?”

Clarke didn’t know how exactly to describe what she’d seen when she was there. She kept her experiences to herself, instead. 

“The Grounder’s blood, when transfused with any of their people’s blood, especially those who’d come into contact with radiation, it…it helped them. The people inside Mount Weather can’t survive outside like we can. Their bodies can’t combat against the radiation.”

“If they use Grounder’s blood, then why would they be coming after us?” 

Clarke paced back and forth in front of her mother, trying to remember what Jasper had told her earlier. “Jasper didn’t tell me everything… it sent him into some sort of panic attack. But, he did say that our blood, his blood, helped them. How, I don’t know. He didn’t get to say much before I told him it was okay to not talk about it.” 

Abby hummed as Clarke continued to pace. Clarke stopped and looked at her mother, eyes wide with realization. She began to talk with her hands moving as fast as her thoughts were going and paced again.

“Our blood is obviously compatible, if that’s a correct term to use, with radiation. Theirs is not. So combined…while it wouldn’t allow them to walk around like us, it could possibly be able to heal them if they did happen to be exposed to the radiation.” She said. “That’s the only explanation I can think of…” 

Clarke stopped abruptly again. “I need to go find Jasper and Monty.” 

She also knew she’d need to find Bellamy as he always knew what to do, but she didn’t allow herself to think about that just yet. Her neck began to burn again and her stomach knotted just thinking about him.

She turned to walk away but her mother grabbed at her arm, eyes dancing. “Clarke, you need to change first.”

Clarke looked down at the wet clothes sticking to her body. “Right.” 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

After she’d gotten a dry outfit: a pair of plain tan jeans, white shirt and winter coat and boots courtesy of her mother, she sent herself on a mission to find her friends. The same friends she hadn’t really spoken to in a long while. 

Clarke stomach tightened. It was going to be awkward; it was going to be outright uncomfortable. But she had to tell them—everything. How she was going to tell them exactly, she didn’t know. How they’d take the information…she didn’t know that either. All that was important right now was that she found them. 

She found Jasper at a campfire, alone. He was staring at the flames, lost in thought. Clarke hesitantly sat beside him on the log and stared into the flames, too. Silent, she took the time to allow herself to really think about just how far they’d come. How hard it’d been for the 100, and here they were, still standing. Maybe not all of them survived, but a big enough sum did, and the thought allowed her heart to swell with pride. It hadn’t been easy, and she and Bellamy might not be on good terms, but she had to admit that they did a good job together. 

Clarke allowed her to bring herself back to the present. “Jasper?”

He hummed, but didn’t exactly acknowledge her presence. “I need you to meet me in Monty’s tent, okay? And grab anyone you see on the way there: Octavia and Lincoln, Raven…Bellamy. Can you do that for me?” 

He looked up at her, eyes dark. “Sure. Is there something wrong?”

Clarke shook her head slightly, “Can’t say; we don’t really know for sure. But I wanted to let everyone know just in case, you know?”

He nodded and stood. Clarke hadn’t noticed before, but he’d really grown.

“Thanks, Jasper.” She gave him a small smile. 

He smiled back, but it didn’t quite meet his eyes. “No problem. See you soon.” 

Clarke stood, an odd sensation running through her body. Things would never be the same, they’d gone through way too much… but it still got to her. Hypocritical, really, knowing her actions, but still, she couldn’t help it.

She made her way to Monty’s tent, putting purpose into her stride. She was feeling more and more confident as she got closer. She reached it finally and pulled back the flap, entering. 

Around Monty’s bed stood her friends, or at least, people she still considered friends, whether the feeling was mutual or not: Raven, standing beside Monty who was wide awake, running her fingers through his hair and Jasper beside her, watching Monty guiltily, as if it had been Jasper himself who shot Monty. Octavia and Lincoln were there, too, of course, standing to the side like always. And then there was Bellamy, staring at her. 

She stared back, feeling more like herself than ever before in the last few months. 

It turned out that, after all this time, all Clarke really needed was something to happen to get her back to normal. With the new threat of Mount Weather, she felt like she was on her way to being Clarke again. 

Clarke Griffin—leader of the Sky People.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly didn't know how to end this chapter, but I DID know I didn't want them to start talking yet so...yeah.
> 
> I know the story's been kind of slow, too, but Its about to get real interesting, I promise. ;)
> 
>  
> 
> Also, I don't edit if you've noticed a few mistakes. I've realized it really kills my writing process so I've stopped all together until I finish something. So if you notice a big mistake such as awkward wording, don't be afraid to drop a comment and let me know. :)


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke lets the group know whats happening and two members seem to know more than they let on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is much shorter than usual so I apologize ahead of time! :/   
> Also, my finals are coming up so I might not be updating every two days like usual, but I'll try my hardest. :)  
> Thank you guys for reading!

Bellamy noticed a change in Clarke immediately as she entered the tent and stood in front of their small group. The atmosphere was charged with apprehension. 

Clarke looked to Monty immediately, a smile stretching across her lips. “You’re awake.” 

“Yeah, I woke up just before you stormed out of the tent earlier.” He gave a small smile looking guilty.

“Oh.” Clarke’s face burned and she met Bellamy’s eyes. She stared at him like she could see through him. It gave him chills.

Clarke looked away. She walked across the tent to Monty’s bed and did her usual checkup, running her palm against Monty’s forehead and more. Bellamy watched her from afar.

“You’ll be okay.” Clarke whispered.

“I know.” Monty clasped Clarke’s hand gratefully. “Thank you.” 

Clarke smiled, but then her eyebrows furrowed. She looked between Monty and Jasper. “If you guys hid in a car…how’d you get shot?” 

“Um,” Monty started hesitantly. “Well, I don’t know, really. It was probably sometime between the start of the ambush and making our way to the car. We didn’t really notice until I fainted from blood loss, I guess…all the chaos must have distracted me from the pain.” He stated the statement like a question.

“Alright…I’m just glad you’re okay.” She smiled at him tight-lipped. Bellamy knew something was up, and apparently so did Clarke. But why lie about how you got shot? 

Raven was fidgeting. She crossed her arms over her chest. “Are you going to tell us the news or what?” 

Clarke looked up at her, eyes soft. “Yes. I just wanted to make sure Monty was okay, Raven.” 

Raven bit her lip. 

“Thank you guys for coming, I assume Jasper informed you that there was something I wanted to share with you all.”

Everyone remained silent, but Octavia nodded. Clarke was grateful for the girl.

Clarke cleared her throat. “Okay, well. Apparently our friends up the mountain have been busy.” 

Bellamy’s eyes darted across the tent at Monty and Jasper whose faces lost their color. They looked at each other nervously.

Bellamy spoke up, stepping forward. His gun was visible at his side. “What does that mean exactly?”

Clarke met his gaze again and it was like old times. He knew immediately what she meant. 

“Why?” His brows furrowed. 

Octavia glanced between Clarke and Bellamy. “Alright, not all of us can communicate by glances. What does that mean?” 

Bellamy smiled to himself. 

“It means,” Clarke said. “That we’ve got a problem…possibly. We don’t exactly know what they’re doing.”

They all looked incredibly confused. Well, all of them minus the suspicious-looking boys and Bellamy. 

“They’ve been spotted in the woods nearby here. Probably just after the ambush Monty and Jasper talked about.”

Octavia gasped and Raven looked taken aback. “Why?”

“I don’t really know, neither does mom. I was sort of hoping that,” Clarke looked over at Monty and Jasper. “You guys could help us with that.” 

The boys exchanged a glance and Bellamy watched them closely. He had the overwhelming urge to go stand by Clarke, where he belonged. They were co-leaders after all, weren’t they? She said so herself. Bellamy held himself back, though.

Monty looked up at Clarke. “I don’t really know why, either. But there’s got to be a reason, right? Maybe they need something.” His voice was shaky.

“One second, guys.” Bellamy walked over to Clarke and grasped her elbow, pulling her outside the tent. She didn’t protest. When they stepped outside the tent, Bellamy didn’t release her arm and Clarke didn’t pull away. They stood close together and Bellamy could feel the heat radiating off her. It was nice in the cold night. 

“What Bellamy?”

“Shhh, keep your voice low.” He looked at her for real for the first time in ages. It was dark, but the torches around Camp Jaha allowed him visibility. Her hair was the same golden hue as always, in the same braided headband way, but there was something different about her; maybe she’d changed in a greater way than physical appearance. Bellamy didn’t know if in a good or bad way. He met her eyes. “There’s something off with Monty and Jasper.”

“I know, but I don’t want to push them.” She glanced at the ground. 

Bellamy let go of her elbow. “Do you want me to watch them over the next couple of days?”

Her lips thinned but she didn’t disagree. Clarke seemed to think it over in her head. “Yes.” She said hesitantly. “But don’t make it obvious.”

Bellamy nodded. “Anything else?”

Clarke looked up at him, studying his face. He hoped he didn’t seem too ready to listen to her, but he couldn’t help it. Clarke was being his Princess again. 

“No, I don’t think so.” She looked towards the tent. 

“Okay.”

“Thank you.”

There was a silence before Bellamy suggested going back inside the tent. “It’s a bit cold.”

Clarke gave a small smile but didn’t meet his eyes. “You’re right.” She lifted the flap and entered the tent.

Bellamy stayed back a couple seconds, sighing. He felt a huge weight lifted off his shoulders. He lifted the flap and entered the tent, finding himself at Clarke’s side like he should have been the whole time. Things were going to be bumpy with Clarke for a while longer, he expected; but there was one thing that he knew for sure. 

His Princess was back.


	5. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Bellamy have a moment. :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again...sort of shorter than I planned.  
> But it's sort of a filler chapter, really. I just wanted to give you guys a real Bellarke moment. :)  
> I wrote a lot more with more plot-driving stuff but It was getting really long so I'm separating it into two chapters. I'll probably upload again later today. :)
> 
> Thank you for all of your wonderful comments, they drive me to continue writing! Now enjoy! xx

Monty and Jasper’s wary glances lingered at the back of Clarke’s head long after the meeting that took place days ago. She wanted to trust them, she really did, but there was just something…off. Clarke still felt the uncomfortable pinch in her stomach when she agreed that Bellamy should watch over them. 

Clarke bit her lip, guilt gnawing at her. Even now as she sat by the fire across from Monty, finally up and out of the Camp Jaha’s medical tent, she couldn’t help the feeling that there was something up with them. They seemed… tense. Jumpy. 

The air was cold but the fire was warm; particularly on her legs and cheeks. Her arms rested on her knees, crossed, her torso leaning over them desperate for warmth. She sighed inwardly, wishing she’d stop overthinking everything. Maybe they just had some sort of Post-traumatic stress disorder. Who knows what they went through in there, after all? She couldn’t bear to ask.

But as she continued to look at Monty, his silhouette outlined by the flames, she felt the same gut-wrenching feeling that something was wrong. The same feeling she had felt inside Mount Weather. She had been right then; what if she was right, now, too? Even Bellamy had noticed something. It couldn’t be merely her imagination. 

She closed her eyes, focusing on the heat enveloping her. Beside her, someone sat down. The way he or she did so quietly led her to believe it was Bellamy. Only he could be so silent. She peeked open her left eye and there he was, as she predicted, illuminated by the flickering light of the fire. She closed her eyes again, enjoying the silence that was bound to be interrupted soon.

Moments passed before she sighed opening her eyes, anxious with Bellamy beside her. “What is it?”

His eyebrows arched. His elbows perched on his thighs. “What?”

She looked around the camp fire, searching for anything to focus on other than the close proximity between her and Bellamy. With nothing particularly interesting, she settled for the shadows upon the ground created by the dancing flames. She interlaced her hands and spared a glance at him. 

“Is there not something wrong?” She asked, surprised at her sharp tone.

“No.” 

It was silent again. You could hear the crackling of the burning wood. Finally, Clarke begrudgingly apologized. “Sorry.”

“Not a big deal, I understand.”

Of course he did. He understood everything about her apparently. She hated that, too. 

“Look, Clarke.” Bellamy said, looking at her. Clarke kept her focus on the shadows. His voice quieted. “I was thinking…maybe we should go check out the forest where Monty and Jasper were found.”

Clarke looked up abruptly. She searched for Monty but he was nowhere to be seen. Clarke and Bellamy were alone. When had Monty left? He hadn’t even said goodnight. Clarke’s stomach tangled unpleasantly. 

Clarke finally made direct eye contact with Bellamy. The flames danced in his eyes and Clarke couldn’t look away. “Think we’d find anything?” 

Bellamy shrugged. “Don’t know. Worth a look, though.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Clarke forced herself to look away. 

“Clarke.” 

She hummed, hating how she felt a shiver run through her as he spoke her name. 

“Even if they’re lying about this whole thing…they could have a good reason behind it all.”

Clarke wilted over. “What if I don’t trust them?” Her voice cracked.

“You have to trust your instincts.”

Her voice dimmed. “But what if my instincts are wrong and I’m just turning away from my friends, just for a dumb itch at the back of my brain?” 

He lightly touched her shoulder. “When have your instincts ever been wrong?”

Clarke considered this and she couldn’t think of one time. Whether or not her memory was elapsing from her or whether Bellamy’s touch was too distracting to think, she couldn’t tell. He moved his arm away. 

She remained quiet until she decided to change the subject. She gathered her courage and turned completely towards him, pulling her knees up to her chest. Her arms enfolded around them as she rested her head upon them. She looked up at him. “Did you hear or see anything when you were with them earlier?”

Bellamy mimicked her movements until they mirrored each other; only, Bellamy sat straight up rather than resting on his knees. He gave her a small smile. “No, not really. Not that they would risk saying anything with me around, anyway.” 

“And why is that?” 

He paused. “I’d end up reporting everything back to you, either way.” 

He stared at her and Bellamy always wore his emotions on his face. Clarke couldn’t take it much longer, but she stared back. Maybe it was the sleep deprivation getting to her. With the moon full, a fire warming her in the brisk cold and Bellamy in front of her, she let her walls fall one by one. 

“Oh,” She whispered.

“Does that surprise you?” 

It didn’t. They were a team. Leaders of the Sky People. “No. It’s just weird hearing it sometimes. Sometimes,” She said softly. “I still feel like the girl locked up in space, drawing on the floors. But so much has happened since then.” She laughed dryly before adding, “The idea that people look up to me, to us, is so absurd.”

Bellamy just looked at her, a small grin stretching across his face. Clarke looked down at the log beneath their feet. “The girl who fought me every step of the way since we landed on this godforsaken planet…finds it absurd that people look up to her. Hmm.” 

Clarke glimpsed back up, a small smile fighting its way onto her lips. She didn’t say anything, though. She peeled at the bark on the log. 

“It’s getting pretty late, huh?” 

“Yeah,” Bellamy looked up at the stars, shifting his legs back over the log. It was a dark and clear night and the stars shined brightly above them. “Remember when you asked me if you could wish on that ‘shooting star’?” 

“Yes,” Clarke replied softly, remembering just what her wish had been back then and why she had asked. How she had looked at Finn and Raven…

“I know what I would wish for now.” 

Clarke peeked over at him, turning away from the log. His voice sounded almost tired; a kind of tired that was not caused by lack of sleep. “And what’s that?” 

“I’d wish for everyone to be okay.” He said, staring up at the sky still. He said the words so quietly that Clarke wondered if she’d heard them at all. She knew she had, though, because she wished for the same thing and they were almost always on the same page. 

For a reason unknown to even Clarke, she shifted herself like him, legs draped back over the log, and scooted beside him. She leaned into his chest. “Me too, Bellamy.” Bellamy timidly wrapped his arm around her, his body heat quickly encompassing her. “Me too.” 

Clarke didn’t mention the fact that somewhere she’d heard that you were not to say your wish out loud, to anyone, for then; it would not come true at all.


	6. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally some progress with Bellarke :3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I'm so, so sorry for not updating in like 3 weeks. Semester Exams, new semester stuff...It's all been a bit hectic.

It was unnervingly quiet in the woods. The sound of their footsteps crunching on twigs and leaves lifted into the air around them and each snap put Clarke on edge. It didn’t help that Bellamy invited Murphy, either. Clarke watched him warily.

Bellamy walked beside Murphy ahead of her. He had tried to walk beside Clarke but she had ignored his presence and he finally gave up and stationed himself next to Murphy. Clarke strayed behind in the back, vividly aware of everything around them. The trees stood tall, oh so massively tall. If it weren’t for the fact that the trees were spaced out, they would hide the only light available to the trio. 

Clarke counted her footsteps as they walked towards the area the Guards found Monty and Jasper. 150...151...152...153…

They had been walking for a while now. Clarke, alone, was able to think once again. About anything and everything; about Finn, Raven, Monty and Jasper, Mount Weather…last night with Bellamy. A shiver ran down her spine. She counted.

154…155…156…157… 

“Clarke, Murphy thinks we’re close.” 

Clarke hadn’t noticed that Bellamy had stopped. Her head snapped up back to reality. He stood in front of her now, watching her. She stopped and stared. Thoughts swarmed her within seconds and Clarke looked back to the ground as if she was studying the plant life. Bellamy is not Finn, she reminded herself.

“Alright,” she spoke clearly, straightening. She pushed past him, but Bellamy grabbed at her wrist. 

“Clarke, are you alright?” He studied her like a she would a patient. Clarke tugged her arm away from him. 

“I’m fine, now let’s go. This has taken longer than we have the time for.” She pushed forward to where Murphy stood and Bellamy followed. The three stood in a regular patch of forest no different than any other. 

“This is where you found them?” Bellamy asked. 

“Yeah, they were just walking around looking like a bunch of idiots.” 

Clarke slowly circled around taking in the area for the first time. Something wasn’t right. She looked to Murphy. “How far away are we from the drop ship?”

“As far as I know, nowhere near it.” Bellamy interrupted, just as Murphy began to reply. 

Clarke shot Bellamy a look before turning back to Murphy. “How is that possible if Jasper said that they were halfway to the drop ship when the attack happened?”

Murphy waited for Bellamy to respond. When Bellamy made no hint of doing so, Murphy turned to Clarke. “Simple, either they were stumbling around for a while that by the time we found them they were no longer near where the attack happened, or they lied.” 

Clarke focused on the first conclusion and decided that maybe her friends hadn’t lied at all, despite their weird behavior. Their behavior could be blamed on the crap they had been through.  
But Clarke also knew she was just trying to defend them; she knew deep down in her pinched stomach that Monty and Jasper lied about what really happened when they escaped Mount Weather. 

Bellamy’s eyebrows furrowed. “Maybe we shouldn’t start here, then. Maybe we should start at the drop ship.” 

Clarke hummed. He had a point. “Start at drop ship and search around it? There would be signs that something went down, bodies or not.” 

Bellamy nodded. 

Clarke turned and headed towards the charred battlefield. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

The drop ship was deserted. The land was still charred in some places, but green life sprouted everywhere else. Life was quick to recover from the fire that happened possibly over a year ago, though there was no way to tell the true passage of time.

Clarke sometimes still found herself a little surprised by the life on Earth and how amazing it truly was. She’d learned all about the plant life in school, but there was a distinct difference between learning and experiencing. She didn’t understand how the people who lived on Earth beforehand could have destroyed the beautiful planet. 

Behind her, Bellamy nudged her shoulder. She turned and looked up at him. His hair was plastered to his head from sweat. Despite the colder weather, they’d been walking for a while and exhaustion was enveloping them. 

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”

She nodded, still taking it all in. She looked over at Murphy and noticed he’d already taken a seat on an abandoned log. Clarke gnawed on her bottom lip, debating with herself. She looked into sky, noting that the sun had already started its descent.

“We’re going to camp here for the night so you guys can drop your stuff in the drop ship.”

“Whatever you say, Princess.” Murphy mocked, irritation lacing his words. Clarke noted his walk, how it straightened easily as he walked into the drop ship. 

Bellamy adjusted the bags on his shoulder. “Still want to go out and check things out?” 

“I don’t see the point in going now, it’s already getting dark. We’ll check things out in the morning before heading back.” 

Bellamy nodded. “Fair enough. Let’s go get situated and get some food in our stomachs, yeah?”

Clarke smiled. “Alright, sounds good to me.”

“And…I may or may not have stashed some of Monty’s moonshine in here.” Bellamy grinned, opening the flap of the drop ship for Clarke to enter. 

“Oh…great.” Clarke feigned enthusiasm. She remembered the last time she’d gotten drunk with Finn and Wells. Not a good memory. 

They entered the metal structure and Clarke immediately made her way up to the top with no intention of having moonshine with the guys. She climbed the ladder and found the stray medical bed they had used for patients. Abby had wanted to take it back to Camp Jaha but Clarke insisted that it stay in case someone on a trip needed medical assistance quickly and couldn’t make it all the way to Camp for it. Clarke was thankful because now she had a bed to lie in for the night. 

Clarke threw her bag onto the floor and jumped onto the bed, stretching her entire body out. She groaned as her back cracked in several places after the long day. Finally, she wrapped her arms beneath her head and closed her eyes. She hummed, not liking the silence enveloping her. 

Soon, she heard the creak of the ladder, meaning someone was coming up. Clarke didn’t move and pretended to be asleep, her humming immediately silenced. The hatch opened, closed and then Bellamy whispered, his voice sounding much closer to Clarke. “Murphy’s asleep.” 

Clarke didn’t reply. “Clarke,” Bellamy. “I know you’re not sleeping.” He seemed to be hiding a laugh.

Reluctantly, Clarke peeked open an eye. “How’d you know?” 

He smiled, but didn’t say anything. Instead, Bellamy made his way to sit at the edge of Clarke’s makeshift bed. She sat up and curled her legs into herself and looked at him, waiting. “Seriously, how’d you know? I usually get away with it.” 

Bellamy’s eyebrows arched. “Oh? You fake sleep often?” He laughed and pulled out a bottle from his side and uncapped it, sipping from it gingerly. He shook his head and then looked back at Clarke seriously. “You snore far too loudly.” 

Clarke’s mouth gaped and she smacked Bellamy’s arm. “Bellamy! Do not.” She laughed, head tilting to the side. She watched the drink carefully; scared to know how Bellamy would respond to the drink once intoxicated.

He grinned. “Do to.” 

Clarke’s face lit up in realization. “How do you know that though, Bellamy? Do you watch me sleep?”

Bellamy seemed to tense, and took another long sip from the bottle. “Of course not. I can hear you all the way from my tent.” He let out a loud laugh, clutching at his stomach. “Oh man, you’re so loud that I bet the whole camp can hear you.”

Clarke’s eyes widened and her whole face flushed. “Wait, really?” When he didn’t respond quickly enough, she tugged on the sleeve of Bellamy’s jacket. “Do I seriously snore like that?” She leaned towards his face trying to catch his eyes, ready to catch him lying. 

Instead, she found dark brown eyes staring at her intently. Bellamy’s face was already slack from the moonshine and his body was becoming sluggish but his stare was stout.

“Bellamy?” She whispered, her stomach tightening. She watched him hesitantly, but then Bellamy averted his gaze. Clarke released the breath she hadn’t known she was holding.

Quietly, Bellamy whispered and Clarke focused hard on his words. “You really do snore that loud.”

She laughed and nudged him, “I do not, you liar.” 

He took another long sip from the bottle and chuckled. “You’re right. You don’t.” 

He turned towards her and offered the bottle, which, surprisingly, she took. Clarke considered that, under the circumstances, a drink or two wouldn’t harm anyone. She took a sip and her whole face scrunched up. Okay, maybe just one drink. 

But, as the night continued, Clarke found herself taking sip after sip until the bottle was empty, quickly becoming accustomed to the bitter taste. At some point, she and Bellamy situated themselves side by side atop of the medical bed, passing the bottle to each other before it was empty. She couldn’t remember when; everything was getting fuzzy. It was a nice change from being vividly aware of everything. 

They muttered between themselves about random nothingness. Butterfly-this, deer-that. Things they probably wouldn’t remember in the morning, anyhow. But then a silence fell between the two. Not an uncomfortable silence. 

Clarke glanced over at Bellamy, head spinning, and found Bellamy already looking at her. She smiled lazily. “You know,” Bellamy whispered, his harsh breath hitting Clarke’s face. “You actually have a very cute snore.” 

Clarke laughed and smiled at him, her stomach swirling. “That’s what I thought.”

He grinned and leaned towards her. Soon, his warm lips pressed against hers and she leaned into Bellamy. His hand cupped her face, bringing her closer to him. The kiss was gentle but firm; desperate almost. Clarke found her hands clasped around Bellamy’s neck, tangling in his hair. But it was over as quickly as it had happened.

Clarke pulled away, face flushed, breath uneven. Bellamy grinned lazily, chest rising and falling. He reached across her, placing a stray piece of loose hair behind her ear. “Goodnight, Clarke.” He turned away and towards the ceiling, where Clarke watched as his breathing evened and he was asleep.

She turned away from him, mind racing. She seemed suddenly very wide awake.

“Goodnight, Bellamy.” She whispered.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: Holy crap, I've made it to chapter 7! I've never managed to write anything past a first chapter, and I've made it to 7! Not even just that, but you guys like this story! I'm so glad you guys enjoy it, and I hope I won't let you down. Thank you for all your reads, votes and comments. They inspire me to keep writing each chapter. xx

Bellamy woke with a splitting headache. He opened his eyes and found himself entangled with Clarke’s sleeping body. Her blonde hair was sprayed over the edge of the bed and she looked incredibly peaceful. He felt a small smile stretch across his lips before he remembered. As brief snippets of the night came back to him, his eyes widened. He kissed her. Bellamy had kissed Clarke.

Oh, man. He didn’t know how he was going to get out of this one. Bellamy slowly disentangled himself from her arms, extra careful not to disturb her, and got out of the bed. He forced himself not to look back at Clarke.

Out of bed, Bellamy stumbled around with his head pounding. There was a clank as his foot came into contact with something and when he looked down, he saw the two, empty bottles they had drank from last night and Bellamy came to the realization that Clarke got immensely drunk; way more so than Bellamy. A startling amount of relief coursed through Bellamy. If he didn’t remember everything from last night, surely she wouldn’t either. She may not remember the kiss happened at all.

Bellamy felt….something. He didn’t really know what. But the idea that Clarke wouldn’t remember just felt….he didn’t know. Either way, it was better off that she didn’t remember. Things would be awkward and tense and they didn’t need that because of Bellamy’s drunken actions. Never again.

While Bellamy walked around the drop ship, he felt conflicted. He wasn’t in the mood to see Murphy just yet, but he didn’t want to get back in bed with Clarke, either. It would feel wrong. It would also confirm to her that something had in fact happened once she woke up, too, and he didn’t want that.

Bellamy found himself sitting against the wall resting his eyes. Bellamy chuckled softly when he noticed that Clarke was snoring. She did snore, and it was cute. He shook the thought away and focused on their morning plans.

Once everyone was awake, they’d have their improvised breakfast and head out in search of the 45 of their people who, according to Monty and Jasper, were murdered by the men of Mount Weather in retaliation of their escape. What would they find? What would they do if they found 45 of the people they were meant to look after…dead? What if they didn’t find them at all?

Bellamy was taken out of his thoughts when he sensed someone staring at him. He hesitantly opened his eyes only to find Clarke staring at him, eyebrows furrowed, sitting up in bed. Her hair was a mess and Bellamy hid his smile with a yawn. Clarke looked around the drop ship, her eyes resting on the bottles on the floor.

“You feeling okay?” He asked.

Clarke’s attention snapped to Bellamy and she let out a groan, clutching at her head. “Wonderful.”

“Oh, I bet. All that alcohol in your system must be doing wonders on your head.”

She stared at him, eyebrows arched. “Oh yeah, it did wonders on my brain last night. I had the weirdest dream.” 

Bellamy looked away, absorbed with tying his shoes. “Oh?”

“Yeah.”

It was silent, and Bellamy looked up at her, only to find Clarke staring at the empty spot where Bellamy had fallen asleep. He cleared his throat, standing up. “Uh, I’ll go wake up Murphy and get everything ready to leave. Just come down when you’re ready.”

Clarke simply murmured in response as Bellamy crossed the room and climbed down the ladder. Bellamy felt her eyes linger on him until he was out of sight.

Climbing down the ladder, Bellamy found it difficult to concentrate on moving his arms and legs. He kept thinking about Clarke’s arms and legs, instead. When the image of Clarke’s legs wrapped around his own this morning flashed through his mind, he found himself falling through the air. Smack.

“Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” Murphy’s voice rang out groggily from the floor in the corner of the drop ship.

Bellamy groaned, picking himself off the ground. He stood and dusted himself off. “No, but I sure as hell broke a few nails crawling out of hell.”

Murphy propped himself up against the wall. “Oooh, good one.”

Bellamy crossed the floor putting their items back into the bags. He laid out three protein bars and a water bottle before dropping all their bags at the door, ready to go. He grabbed one of the bars and tossed it to Murphy. “Get ready. As soon as Clarke’s down here we’re heading out.”

“The princess and her knight in shining armor always bossing others around,” Murphy taunted, rolling up his sleeping bag and placing it into his bag. “Perfect match, really.” The protein bar hit him in the back of the head. He turned, scowling. “Thanks.”

Bellamy smiled. “No problem, Murph.”

The creaking of the ladder stopped the boy’s bickering. “Murph? Really, Bell?” Clarke asked, stepping off the ladder.

Bellamy didn’t allow himself to overthink about the nickname. “What’s wrong with Murph?”

Clarke glanced over at Murphy, who was now propped up against the wall on one shoulder, arms crossed. “I’m sure he doesn’t appreciate it. It’s not his name, just as how your name isn’t Bell.”

She was using the name to mock him. He shrugged, glancing over at her with a smirk. “I really don’t mind you calling me Bell.”

A hint of redness spread across her cheeks. “Well, that’s not the point. We need him to help us find our people. We’re not going to be rude to him by calling him a stupid nickname, okay?”

Bellamy arched his eyebrows and scoffed. “It’s not a stupid nickname. It’s a classic.”

Clarke gave a faint smile. “Whatever, Bellamy. Are you guys ready to go?”

“Clarke, you need to eat first; especially after last night.” Bellamy grabbed the protein bar and extended it out to her. 

Clarke stared at the bar before reluctantly taking it. “I’ll eat on the way there, we’re wasting time.”

Bellamy noticed Murphy watching them, amusement dancing in his eyes. Murphy caught Bellamy’s eyes and wriggled his eyebrows suggestively. “What happened last night?” He mouthed.

“Shut up, Murphy.”

Clarke looked over at them, having not noticed what Murphy had said. “What?”

“I don’t know; I didn’t do anything.” Murphy shrugged with a smile.

Bellamy glanced over at Clarke. “Nothing. Ignore me.”

“Can we just go find our friends now?” Clarke snapped, kneading her temples.

Bellamy shot a glare at Murphy, who just smiled. Bellamy grabbed his gun and bag and adjusted both onto his shoulders. “Murphy, grab your stuff and let’s go.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

They’d been walking for a good hour and they’d found nothing. Bellamy couldn’t decide whether that was a good or bad thing. He hoped it was a good thing. No dead bodies than…maybe they weren’t dead?

Bellamy looked ahead at Clarke, who was basically dragging herself at this point. She was exhausted.

“Maybe we should head back.” Bellamy offered.

Those words stopped the group in their tracks and Clarke turned on Bellamy. There was a crazy gleam in her eyes as she stepped in front of his body, close enough for Bellamy to feel the heat radiating off her body. They hadn’t been that close to each other since the kiss.

Clarke poked Bellamy hard in the chest. “Our people are out there somewhere, possibly dead, and you want to head back?”

Bellamy shifted uncomfortably. “Clarke…”

“Don’t ‘Clarke’ me, Bellamy. Our people are out here somewhere and we need to find them. I’m…” Her voice cracked. “I’m not going back until we find them.”

Clarke and Bellamy stared at each other, waiting for the other to say something. Bellamy closed his eyes before muttering, “Clarke, maybe they’re not out here.”

Clarke looked up at him, eyes wide and hopeful. “What?”

Bellamy chewed on the inside of his cheek. He didn’t like giving false hope, but maybe he wasn’t. “Maybe Jasper and Monty lied. We figured that in the first place, right? If they lied…maybe the whole story is a lie and none of our people ever escaped in the first place.”

Murphy walked towards them, leaving his spot against a tree. “He could be right. Sure, the lack of bodies could be explained by the Mountain Men taking them…but what about the lack of blood?” Murphy motioned his hand over the ground. “There’s no blood. The only blood that we’ve seen on the ground was from Monty’s gunshot wound back where the guards and I found him. If there had been a massacre…”

“There’d be a lot of blood.” Clarke whispered, her eyes searching the ground.

She glanced up at Bellamy, still only inches away from him, eyes glistening. She touched his arm lightly. “Let’s head back home.”


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was sort of just a filler, sorry. Its been over a week and I figured I just really needed to update *something*. The story is coming along slowly, but its coming along! :) If there are any unforgivable mistakes, let me know. Thank you guys for all of your votes and comments. <3 Enjoy!~

Clarke pushed through the woods heavily, not careful to keep their presence unknown. She had so many emotions flooding her: anger, exhaustion, confusion…but most of all, hope. All of the signs pointed to her friends being alive; she hoped no one had gone and flipped them. 

Clarke led the group straight to the camp, no detours this time. Even with exhaustion coursing through their bodies, they trudged on. Clarke wiped at the sweat on her forehead and the motion caused something to slip from her coat pocket. Looking down, she saw the protein bar Bellamy had given her this morning. She stopped and reached for it, dizziness hitting her. Bellamy got to it first.

“Clarke, why didn’t you eat this? You’re going to faint or something if you don’t get some food into you.”

She rolled her eyes, ignoring the dizziness. “I think I know what I need, Bellamy, and that’s to confront Jasper and Monty about our missing friends. I can eat a proper breakfast when we get there.”

Bellamy’s eyes narrowed. “Have you even had any water?”

Clarke licked her lips. Her dry, chapped lips. “Yes, now can we go?”

“No,” Bellamy argued reaching into his bag. He pulled out a water bottle. “We’re stopping until you get some food and water.”

“Bellamy, we don’t have the time for this,” She huffed.

Bellamy was about to argue some more before Murphy spoke up. “You’re the one wasting time, Clarke. It’ll take us longer to get there if you pass out and we have to carry your stubborn ass.”

“If anything, I’m eating while we walk. Give me the damn bar.”

“Sure thing, Princess,” Bellamy said smugly, handing her the bar.

“Now let’s go, we’re not that far from Camp Jaha.” Clarke remarked, pushing past them, protein bar in hand.

Clarke nibbled at the bar, but she really didn’t have any appetite. She only chewed on it when she could sense Bellamy watching her. Before long, Bellamy must have gotten suspicious because he began to walk alongside her. “How are you feeling?”

“Wonderful.” She spoke, remembering their conversation this morning.

“Oh, I bet,” He smiled.

“What happened last night, Bellamy?” Clarke asked suddenly, not looking at Bellamy. Her focus was on the dead leaves littering the ground, crunching beneath their boots.

“You don’t remember anything, huh? I only remember snippets.” Bellamy added hesitantly, peeking over at her.

“Yeah, it’s just like, this huge passage of time is gone. It’s terrifying.” She mumbled.

“You drank a lot considering you were hesitant to drink in the first place.”

“I woke up with the worst pain in my head…I thought I was dying or something. And then I saw the two bottles on the floor.”

Bellamy nodded. “Yeah, but that wasn’t all you. I drank a bit too much, as well.”

Clarke laughed to herself and looked up at him. “Maybe we had a contest to see who could drink the most and I won.”

He gave her a small smile while continuing to look ahead. “Maybe.”

Clarke peeked up at him, noticing how the early sun rays highlighted his face and brought out the small blemish of freckles that spattered his face. “Remember how I mentioned that I had a dream?”

Bellamy looked over his shoulder, spotting Murphy trailing behind them lazily. “Yeah, I remember.”

“It was weird.” Clarke said after a stretch of silence.

He hummed. “How so?”

Clarke shrugged idly. She looked over at him before facing the forest in front of her. “It just seemed very real.”

“Maybe it was.”

Clarke sucked in her breath. “You can’t possibly mean that.” She whispered.

Bellamy shrugged and Clarke realized she overanalyzed his words. He wouldn’t have… “I don’t know what you dreamed about, so.” 

Clarke rubbed her arms before responding, “You were in it.”

He glanced down at her, her hair shining in the early sunlight. Subconsciously, he dragged his hands across his lips. “I was?”

“Yeah,” Clarke replied simply.

Bellamy hummed.

“Are you going to explain it or?” Bellamy asked. He glanced over at Clarke and noticed that she didn’t look too good. “Clarke, are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Clarke waved him off. “I’m fine, just a bit lightheaded.”

Bellamy reached out towards her, ready to steady her, but she shrugged him off. “I’m fine, Bellamy.”

And Clarke was fine, for a little while.

Clarke walked for another few minutes before bringing the dream back up. “We were lying down in the medical bed, in the drop ship.”

Bellamy gave her his trademark smirk. “Oh?”

Clarke stumbled over a branch but recovered, a red tint washing over her face.

“You okay?”

Clarke nodded, refusing to look him in the eye. She braced herself against a tree, taking a deep breath.

Bellamy hovered near her. “You sure…?”

Clarke straightened, adjusting the bag on her back. “Yeah, fine. Just tripped over a branch or something, let’s go.”

Bellamy brought back their last topic of conversation. His voice rang out in the awkward atmosphere. “So what were we doing?”

Clarke shrugged, she really didn’t want to continue the topic anymore and she wasn’t feeling very well. “We, uh, just talked and stuff.”

Bellamy looked over at her, noting the red that tinted her cheeks. “Cool.”

Clarke suddenly wished she’d eaten the bar when Bellamy had asked her too. Unfortunately, she’d dropped it when she tripped and there was no way was she going to ask Bellamy for another. They were almost to Camp Jaha anyway. She’d make it there and then, like she’d mentioned earlier, she’d eat a proper breakfast before interrogating her friends.

Bellamy seemed to not want to let the dream go. “Anything else happen in your dream?”

Clarke stopped and turned on him. “Is there something you’d like to say Bellamy?”

Bellamy’s eyes widened and this time his cheeks grew red. “No…I just never dream. It’s interesting to hear about others.”

Clarke narrowed her eyes at him, getting the idea he wasn’t being honest. She stepped close to him. The close proximity to Bellamy made her forget the fact she felt like fainting. “Yeah, Bellamy, more stuff happened in the dream, but I get the idea that you already know what I’m talking about.”

Clarke watched as Bellamy’s emotions played out on his face and she knew she was right. Her eyes widened. “It wasn’t a dream, was it?” She asked.

Bellamy closed his eyes, shaking his head slowly.

“Did we…?”

Bellamy remained silent. He opened his eyes, staring down at Clarke. His eyes said everything; Clarke didn’t even have to hear his words.

“Oh…” Clarke said, before spots clouded her vision and darkness over swept her.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I knew where I was going with this but while I was writing this chapter I went a completely different way so we'll see how this goes! In fact, If it doesn't go well, I'll probably end up deleting this chapter and go back to the original way but I don't know, we'll see. And I've written better chapters, I honestly don't like this one much at all, but I hope you like it nonetheless. Sort of just a filler chapter again tbh. Sorry. Enjoy!

Bellamy was torn between being concerned and frustrated. Clarke had passed out, and he was concerned about that, but he was also frustrated because she should have listened to him in the first place. He shouldn’t be carrying her limp ass all the way back to camp.

He looked down at her flaccid self; with her lips parted, long lashes resting upon her cheek, and hair swaying with each step, he couldn’t help but lose all the fight within him. Clarke was passionate, he’d give her that. He just hoped she wouldn’t end up self-destructing in order to save everyone else. Bellamy did not agree with Jaha’s motto, ‘sacrifice the few to save the many’. 

Bellamy’s boots trudged through the forest, leaving behind evidence of his presence. Murphy followed behind him, still amused about the fact that Clarke actually collapsed. It was not long before they found the tree line and Camp Jaha came into view. Within eyesight, Bellamy could see the disorder unfolding inside the camp. People were yelling and racing around frantically, Guards trying to yell over the chaos. Bellamy clutched Clarke harder, glancing over at Murphy warily.

“What happened?” Murphy asked, his amusement gone.

Bellamy scanned the camp, looking for the source of panic. He found none. “Don’t know, let’s go find out.”

The two raced away from the forest to Camp Jaha. Unfortunately, with the chaos, the gate’s Guards were not at their posts. Bellamy and Murphy stood outside the gate, helplessly staring through it. Bellamy spotted Abby in the midst of the panic. “Abby!” He yelled, still clutching Clarke in his arms. 

The Chancellor, amazingly, must have heard him because she turned and locked gazes with Bellamy. Her eyes flicked down to Clarke and she visibly tensed. She turned away from him and grabbed at two Guards who were being shouted at by citizens of Camp Jaha. She yelled something at them and they nodded before turning away and heading in different directions. Abby in turn ran towards Bellamy, Murphy and her daughter.

“Blake, what happened to my daughter?” There was a hard glint in Abby Griffin’s eyes and Bellamy knew that if the answer was not satisfying, he’d have hell to pay.

Bellamy stared right back. “As we all know, Clarke’s stubborn as hell and refused to eat or drink anything until we got back to camp. I’m almost certain she passed out due to exhaustion.” 

Abby rolled her eyes and softened, “Okay, I can fix that fast enough. The Guards should be opening the gate s—” Abby was cut off when there was a load groan and the gates began to open. She stepped out of its path and waited for the boys and her daughter on the other side.

Bellamy still held on to Clarke firmly as he made it through the gates. Abby was soon at his side, offering to take her. “I’ll take her to the medical tent, thank you.”

For whatever reason, Bellamy denied her request. “Don’t worry about it Chancellor, I got her.”

Abby met eyes with Bellamy. She stared at him, long and hard, and when she seemed to find what she was looking for, she walked ahead of him. “Very well, let’s go.”

Bellamy felt a chill run through his body.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

After Bellamy had made sure Clarke was okay and being looked after, he set himself out to figure out what happened. He would have just asked Abby, but she had been dragged away for her Chancellor duties before he had the chance to.

The camp seemed to be under control now, but people still seemed on edge. He could practically feel the apprehension in the air.

Bellamy scanned over the camp, searching for Octavia, but as usual she wasn’t around. She never was anymore. But he’d grown to accept that. She was happy, happier than she’d ever been, and he knew she could take care of herself. That’s all that mattered to him.

Instead, Bellamy caught Raven’s eyes across the camp. Her eyes widened and she started towards him. She had finally agreed to give Wick’s brace a chance and it worked miraculously. Go figure.

When she reached him, she grabbed at his arm and was about to speak before Bellamy interrupted her. “Raven, why is everyone on edge? What happened while we were gone?”

She closed her eyes. “People have gone missing…”

“What? What do you mean?” Bellamy froze.

“They took them, Bellamy. They’re gone.” The words sent a shiver right down Bellamy's spine. 

His eyes narrowed. “Who took who? What?”

She whispered now, glancing warily around her. “The Mountain Men, they took Monty and Jasper.”

Bellamy stumbled back.“What? How? When?” 

She frowned before she looked away from him, rubbing her arms together. “Monty and Jasper left the camp for some reason a few hours ago and…I followed them, or at least tried to.

"I remember your expressions during that ‘meeting’. You and Clarke whispering about something. There wassomething sketchy about them and I figured you guys picked up on it too.

"When I followed them, I was slow of course,” She glared down at her boot. “So by the time I caught up... I had no way of stopping the swarm of men from grabbing Monty and Jasper. And I’m not stupid enough to give away my position in this condition…I'm sorry." 

“But Bellamy,” She added before Bellamy had time to interrupt. “They didn’t even fight back. They went willingly.”

Bellamy’s eyebrows wrinkled together. “None of this makes sense.” He groaned, dragging his hands down his face. “If only you saw this happen out in the woods, why is the camp freaking out?”

Raven looked away again. “I may have wobbled out of the forest yelling for help.”

“Oh.” 

Raven stayed silent. "Wait," Bellamy looked up at her. "Did they not send out any guards? They should have sent out guards." 

"No. For one they didn't believe me, two they claimed they didn't have enough people, and three they were very angry at me for freaking everyone out." She frowned. She stared at the ground before changing the subject. “You guys were gone for a few days, did you find anything?”

“No.” Bellamy was too frustrated to say anymore. He didn’t feel like going into the complex theories they’d conjured up on their trip.

Raven pressed on. “That’s a good thing, right?”

Bellamy’s eyes skimmed back over the camp, not meeting her eyes. “I don’t know.” 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Bellamy was back inside the medical tent, waiting for Clarke to wake up. How was he going to tell her that their friends were gone again? He decided not to think about it. Instead, his thoughts strayed over to the Chancellor and the look she gave him.

What had that been all about? 

Movement from the corner of his eyes silenced his thoughts and brought his focus back to Clarke.

Clarke’s eyes fluttered open and instantly found their way to Bellamy. “Morning,” he whispered.

“What happened?” She asked, pushing herself up into a sitting position. She glanced around the tent.

“Your stubborn ass fainted because you refused to eat or drink anything.”

Her cheeks grew pink. “Oh.”

“Yeah, ‘oh’.” Bellamy crossed the room and stood beside Clarke’s bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Er, a little cloudy in the head.” She said, not meeting his eyes. “Have you seen Monty and Jasper yet? I don’t think I want to face them just yet.”

“About that…” Should he tell her everything that happened? He wasn’t sure. But the words came tumbling out of his mouth before he could stop them. “They’re gone, Clarke.”

Clarke’s attention snapped to him and Bellamy regretted saying anything. “What do you mean by ‘gone’? Did you approach them about their lies and now they’ve run off?”

“No.” Bellamy rubbed the back of his neck.

“Then what do you mean?” She said slowly, an edge in her voice. Her blue eyes locked onto his, and he couldn’t look away.

“According to Raven, Monty and Jasper went willingly into the grasps of Mount Weather.”

Her eyes narrowed. “That’s impossible. They would never do that, Bellamy.”

He shrugged. “That’s just what she told me, and why would she lie?”

Clarke frowned and looked away. “I don’t know. Maybe she’s in on it too.”

“Clarke, we don’t even know what ‘it’ is, but I doubt Raven has anything to do with it. She was never involved with Mount Weather.”

“I know.” She sighed. Clarke seemed on the verge of giving up on everything, and Bellamy wanted nothing more but to take all of her troubles away. “But none of this makes sense. Why would they go willingly?”

“I don’t know.” Bellamy looked away from Clarke and focused on the ground. He really didn’t know, and it was starting to get to him about how wrong this whole situation was.

“What are we going to do, Bellamy?” She whispered, looking up at him. Her body was rigid, as if the world rested upon her shoulders. Maybe it did.

“I don’t know that either. But what I do know,” He added confidently. “Is that we’re going to get our friends back, one way or another.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I don't know why I'm uploading this. I'm SO unsatisfied with this chapter. Pls don't hate me.)


	10. Chapter Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke thinks she's figured out the last puzzle piece.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING ! With the end of school coming up, I've been doing * a lot* of stuff.  
> Hope you guys haven't decided this story sucks yet. 
> 
> BUT ANYWAY, IMPORTANT NOTE: In an earlier chapter, Monty and Jasper mention that they hid out in an underground car or whatever. I CHANGED THIS DETAIL! Instead, they hid out in the bunker Finn found. Yeah...*that* bunker. Alright, ENJOY :D

Clarke was exhausted. Physically, mentally, emotionally. She was still lying in the medical tent, just staring above her.  
The whole situation with Monty and Jasper and the rest of the 47 made no sense. She'd been up all night, staring at nothing in particular, just trying to wrap her mind around the whole thing and still nothing made sense.

Clarke counted slowly to herself, trying to calm her thoughts. 1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8..9..10. Nope, didn't work.

She sat up, irritated. She really just wanted to scream but that would get her nowhere and just freak everyone out. She decided she'd scream, but would muffle it. She grabbed her pillow from behind her and sat it in her lap, smashing her face into the pillow, letting out all of her frustration and pent up anger at everything.

She lay there, panting into her pillow, exhausted. Physically, mentally, emotionally. Eventually she sat up and counted to herself again.  
1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8..9..10.

Taking in a deep breath and exhaling, she cleared her mind. Clarke swung her legs over the bed and stood, pacing. Talking aloud, she started from the beginning, determined to put all the puzzle pieces together. 

"One: Jasper and Monty seemingly appear out of nowhere. Monty has been shot but otherwise the two boys are unharmed.

"Two: When I question what happened, Raven tells me that Jasper told her that the 47 escaped together, only for Mount Weather to catch up to them soon afterward.

"Three: A massacre occurred and all but Monty and Jasper, whom fled to the underground bunker, were killed. Monty claims he must have been shot at some point around this time in the chaos. 

"Four: The next day, during the meeting, Bellamy and I pick up on the feeling that the two boys are lying."

Clarke's voice trailed. She ran a hand through her hair, huffing. She composed herself and began to pace again, contemplating. There had to be something she was missing. She ran through the points again and suddenly gasped, throwing her arms up. "The bunker! Of course."

Clarke hurried over to the bed, grabbing her jacket and slipping it over her shoulders. She had to find Bellamy and set out immediately. 

She threw the flap of the tent open, exiting. Her eyes were wide. She scanned the camp urgently, spotting Raven and Bellamy talking close. Clarke's eyes narrowed despite herself, but she got over the feeling quickly. She made her way over to them. 

When she reached them, she grabbed onto Bellamy's wrist. He looked down at her, almost startled at her sudden appearance. His eyebrows wrinkled. "Clarke, what are you doing out of bed? 

Clarke tried to keep the impatience out of her voice, and with Bellamy's brown eyes (nearly hazel in the sunlight) looking down at her with so much worry in them, it wasn't hard not to. "Not important; we need to go. I think I know where we'll find out last puzzle piece."

"Clarke, you passed out." Bellamy turned to her, just as Raven spoke up. "Wait, what?" 

Clarke had nearly forgotten she was there. Apparently Raven was talking to her again. "Yeah. Remember how Jasper had said they went into the bunker? I know where that is." Clarke omitted the part as to why she knew where the bunker was. Her stomach knotted.

"Maybe we'll find something there." Clarke continued, glancing over at Bellamy. He was staring at her with his arms crossed. 

"I'm not opposed to the idea, I think it's our last option at this point, but you can't go. Raven and I will go." 

Both girls' mouths gaped. Clarke tried to mask the hurt that coursed through her unexpectedly. Instead, she lashed out. "You can't tell me what I can and cannot do, Bellamy. I think you know that well enough. Besides, I'm the one that brought it up." She crossed her arms, willing him to argue. Which he gladly did.

"Clarke, you passed out. You're not medically fit to go on another trip. Did you even eat this morning?" 

Clarke's cheeks grew warm. "Well I'm sorry if I've been too busy trying to figure out what the hell our friends are messed up in. If you haven't noticed, none of this crap makes sense and I'm determined to figure it out. I'm going."

Clarke saw Raven step back away from the two uncomfortably. "Look..." she raised her hands in surrender. "You two should go. I'm kind of crippled anyway. I'd just slow you down, Bellamy." She shrugged. 

Bellamy shot Raven a glance of annoyance. Clarke smiled. "Glad this is settled. 10 minutes, Bellamy." 

She turned her back toward them and made her way to her tent to pack. She wanted to ignore the grumbling of her stomach just to spite Bellamy's worrying, but that would be stupid; and she hadn't eaten a real thing in days. She was starving. Clarke decided she would pack and then go straight to the mess hall. 

She lifted the flap of her tent and entered, only to find Octavia sitting on her bed. 

"Octavia?" Her voice rang out in surprise. In all honesty, Octavia was the last person she expected to be sitting inside her tent. 

"Clarke," She nodded, standing. The young girl crossed her arms and it reminded Clarke of the rebellious teen that had been the first to walk off the drop ship. Octavia was so much more than that these days and her transformation still amazed Clarke. "I want to know what's going on. Everyone's all quiet and on edge, and I get that I'm not here that much, hell I actually just got back, but that doesn't mean I don't want to know what's going on with my friends." 

Clarke sighed, shuffling around the tent to collect the things she'd need. She noted the grounder-warrior look suited Octavia; Clarke saw the new braids that adorned Octavia's hair. "I understand that, really I do, but I can't explain everything right now, okay? There's just too much and not enough time to explain right now. I'm leav—"

"I was there for you after Finn's death, Clarke, and you can't even give me this?" Her voice cut through Clarke sharply. She froze, her hand tightly gripping onto a grey t-shirt. 

She turned towards Octavia, whom wore a guilty expression on her face but a hard glint in her eyes. There was no trace of the young, naïve teen that Clarke once knew. Clarke locked gazes with the new Octavia, hand still grasping onto the t-shirt with a strong grip. "Don't."

Octavia stared at Clarke, unflinching. When Clarke said nothing, Octavia turned away angrily without saying another word. The tent's flap waved after her exit.

Clarke stood there, unmoving, shirt still in her grasp. No one had mentioned Finn's death aloud since, well...ever. Her hands shook, and she abruptly questioned whether going to the bunker was a good idea after all. Maybe Bellamy was right, even if he'd used a different excuse. 

Clarke sat down on her bed and closed her eyes. She allowed herself, for the first time since Finn's death, to really think about everything that had happened. Clarke wished there had been another way. Had there been another way? 

Her gripped tightened on the shirt. No. It was over and she had to move on. There was no other way. Finn did what he did, and he had to pay the consequences for those actions; and he did. In return, Clarke got the alliance she desperately needed in order to save her people from the Mountain. 

Clarke opened her eyes, a single tear falling down her cheek. Even in the end, Finn had helped keep the peace— even if he was also the one who had broken it. He ensured the peace between the Grounders and the Sky people— even if it had cost his life. 'Peacekeeper Finn'.

A strangled giggle made its way out from Clarke's throat, and soon enough Clarke was crying and laughing all at the same time. She probably looked — and sounded— like a maniac, but she couldn't allow herself to care at that moment. Clarke allowed herself to feel everything for once; to finally allow herself to free herself from the burden on her shoulders. 

She took a deep breath and slowly let her breath out, imagining that all her pent up feelings were being released with it. She felt airy and it was so, so nice. She wiped away the tears from her cheeks and stood, feeling so light she almost lost her balance. Finding a new confidence within herself, she grabbed her bag and made her way to the exit. With one last glance around the tent to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything, she left the tent and all of her old baggage behind her, headed towards the mess hall and quite possibly a new, brighter future. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It must have been later in the day than Clarke had first anticipated because as she reached the mess hall, it was quiet and nearly empty. Only handful of people scattered the room, and most were sitting alone. Talking was minimal, and Clarke couldn't help but to think it was from the unrest of Monty and Jasper's disappearance. 

Clarke crossed the room and grabbed her ration before finding an empty table. Sitting down, she accepted the nice silence and ate quietly, counting to herself. Clarke may have finally found peace with the Finn situation, but she didn't have to push herself too hard before she was ready. Lost in counting, she almost didn't notice her mother sit across from her, worry lines sketching her face. 

"Clarke, have you been crying?" She asked, crossing her arms atop of the table. Exhaustion emitted from Abby like a tidal wave, and Clarke felt a tug of sympathy for her mother. Something she didn't feel often, especially recently. 

Clarke looked up from her food, shrugging. It wasn't like she could lie; her crying was evident in the blotchy redness and puffiness that surrounded her eyes, along with the occasional sniffling. 

"I know there's a lot of stuff going on surrounding your friends...I'm sure it's overwhelming; are you okay?" 

For the first time, Clarke truly wanted to reply with honesty. She stared at her food, contemplating her mother's question, before she finally looked up and locked gazes with Abby. Clarke managed a small smile. "I am; I'm okay." 

Abby smiled back, clearly relieved. "Don't be scared to go up for seconds. I made sure they knew you haven't been eating and could use the extra calories for the day. Eat." She emphasized, standing, clearly satisfied with their conversation.

Clarke shook her head, huffing. "You sound like Bellamy." 

Abby froze, her hand on the chair. She hummed. "Yes, he cares about you, as well; worries about you." 

"You both should stop worrying so much. I'm fine; really, I promise." Clarke's cheeks flamed.

Her mother crossed over to the other side of the table to meet Clarke. She rested her hand under Clarke's chin, forcing Clarke to look her in the eyes. "Yes, we know, but we still worry." She removed her hand from Clarke's face and stepped away from the table, walking towards the exit. Before she reached the hallway, she turned back towards Clarke. "I talked to the boy, you know. While you were...out."

Clarke's eyes widened and she glanced around the mess hall. At some point, the rest of the people who had occupied the room had finished their food and exited. "And?"

Abby gave a small smile, eyes glistening. "Like I said, he cares about you. Don't just blow that off, Clarke; take care of yourself and eat something." 

Clarke restrained herself from rolling her eyes, but she couldn't help the blush that spread across her cheeks. "Yeah, I get it." 

Her mother smiled before nodding and turning away. In the silence that engulfed Clarke, her mother's voice rang out clearly from the hallway. "She's in the mess hall, Blake." 

Bellamy's voice followed closely after. Clarke could almost hear him nodding gratefully. "Thank you." 

Clarke smiled despite herself. She had just finished her food when Bellamy arrived in front of her. "You ate, I hope?" 

This time, Clarke couldn't restrain herself. "Yes, Bellamy, I've had food." She gestured to the wrapper in her hand. "Happy?" 

"Delighted." He smiled. 

She narrowed her eyes. "Aren't you going to eat something?"

He arched his eyebrows and laughed. "Already did. Some people get up before noon, Princess." 

Clarke ignored the comment and didn't even flinch at the nickname. Bellamy seemed to have noticed. Clarke ignored that, too, and instead situated her bag over her shoulders are went to the important matter at hand. "Are you ready to go?"

"Ready as I'll ever be. Let's go get our last puzzle piece."


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is only half of the chapter I had originally intended to write and its pretty freaking short but I havent updated in three weeks and I cannot handle the guilt anymore omg I HAD TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING? Also, this may or may not seem out of character. Idk. AND ONE MORE THING. I shamelessly stole the infamous "Clexa" line...I'M SORRY BUT IT WENT WITH THE SCENE OKAY

As they walked through the forest in sync, their boots crushing the dead leaves of the forest floor, Bellamy couldn’t help but feel the heavy questions hanging in the air between the two of them. 

He glanced to the blonde girl beside him, at the stubborn expression that rested on her face, and felt an alarming amount of pride swarm him. They’d accomplished so much since arriving on the ground. He smiled to himself, and Clarke caught it.

“What are you smiling about? It’s midnight, we’re exhausted and our friends are captured inside a mountain.” 

Bellamy’s smile wavered slightly, but then he stopped and grabbed Clarke’s arm and turned her to face him. “It’s midnight, we’re exhausted and our friends are captured inside a mountain— but we’re alive. They’re alive.”

Clarke turned away, her eyes drifting to the ground. A loud hoot escaped into the air and Clarke looked for the animal that had released the sound. “Clarke, that’s something to be proud of.” 

She snatched her arm away from him and sent him a glare. “We don’t know they’re alive. They could be dead for all we know.”

Bellamy’s mouth gaped, but no words came out. Finally, he spoke hesitantly. “You’re right. They could be, but we don’t know that, so I’m going to have hope that they’re not.” He tried to meet Clarke’s eyes. “It wouldn’t make sense if they were.” 

“Why wouldn’t it?” Clarke scoffed, kicking at the ground. 

Bellamy reached his hand out and touched Clarke’s shoulder lightly. “Because then Mount Weather wouldn’t have any of the blood they need.”

Clarke softened, but her eyes held firm. “They have the grounder’s blood, which was working just fine before we arrived.”

He drew closer to her and whispered with an angry intensity, “Maybe you’re right, but if they’re all dead, then why would Monty and Jasper return? Willingly, for fuck’s sake.”

“Raven could be lying.” She crossed her arms, but this time her eyes wouldn’t meet his.

“Clarke,” Bellamy scorned, his voice tight with frustration. “You’re smarter than that.”

Clarke backed away further and her back hit the trunk of a tree. She seemed to almost collapse against it, thankful for the support. 

Bellamy wilted, and realized what Clarke’s real problem was. He ambled over and slid his arm beneath hers, supporting her. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have been so harsh.” 

A whimper arose from the girl in his arms and she pocketed her head into his shoulder, her arms wrapping themselves around his torso. “I’m sorry, too. I should have faith in them, I know, but I’m so scared to truly believe they’re okay because if it turns out they’re not, I don’t think I could take it.”

As the words left her mouth, she crumpled into him. She shed silent tears as Bellamy tried to comfort her, rubbing her back with his palm. When she calmed, Bellamy placed a finger under her chin and made her look up at him. With his other hand, he wiped away the stray tears that soaked her cheeks and she tensed. 

She gazed up at him with misty eyes and slowly relaxed once again into his arms. “Bellamy,” she whispered.

He hummed, lost in his motions and how close he was to her. He’d never felt so warm. “Thank you.” 

Bellamy closed his eyes and rested his head upon hers and his stomach tangled. Clarke’s hand rested upon the hand Bellamy had rested on her cheek. Her warmth sent a shiver down his spine. “It’s okay to be afraid.” He said softly, not sure who he was trying to convince.

She hummed back in response, and this time Clarke’s finger rested underneath his chin, forcing him to look up at her. He opened his eyes. There was a soft look shared between the two, and then Clarke leaned in. He didn’t question it; Bellamy gladly met her half way. Their lips were not soft, rather dry and cracked from lack of water, but their kiss was delicate; almost fragile. 

Neither of them had realized just how much they needed the other before their hands tangled around each other and soon their slow kiss grew desperate. Their hands pulled on their clothes, in each other’s hair, anywhere they could grip. Bellamy grasped Clarke against him and pushed them against a tree without breaking contact with her. His hands trailed down her back and Clarke grasped at his shirt, breath uneven. Their actions were feverish before Clarke pulled away.

Clarke nestled her head into the crook of Bellamy’s neck and he wrapped his arms around her. She let out a sigh and released herself from his arms. Without looking at him, she mumbled, “Sorry.” 

Bellamy pulled her back to him and Clarke looked up. As she gazed at him, searching his eyes for something, Bellamy pushed a stray strand of hair out of her face behind her ear. “Sorry?”

Clarke’s cheeks flushed as she met his eyes. “That was childish of me.”

Bellamy gave her a small smile, cupping her cheek. “I don’t mind.”

“Well, I mind.” Clarke huffed, glancing away. “I can’t just be throwing myself at you.” 

Bellamy leaned into Clarke and rested their foreheads against each other. Her hair smelt like the woods and he loved it. Threading his fingers through it, he couldn’t remember a time he felt so at peace. There with Clarke, he felt whole. “What if I want you to ‘throw yourself at me’?” He whispered, a slight smile overtaking his lips.

“Bellamy,” Clarke warned, but her voice was soft. “We can’t be getting caught up in a re— whatever this is— right now. Not with our friends in trouble.”

He removed himself away from her. She was right of course, but was it horrible to want to forget about everything for a few minutes? “I know. I’m sorry. You’re right. Let’s just go check out the bunker.” 

Clarke grasped at his wrist and her eyes were hesitant. “Wait.” She closed her eyes and paused. “…maybe life should be about more than just surviving.” 

With this, she pulled Bellamy to her again and kissed him. This kiss was soft, not desperate like the one they’d shared only moments ago. Understanding, Bellamy realized. Clarke understood how he felt about wanting to forget for a little while. 

Bellamy was the only to pull away first. Placing a loose strand of hair behind her ear, Bellamy finally reorganized his priorities. “Let’s go find that bunker.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ITS SO SHORT, IM SORRY


End file.
